I read through the previous post and was smiling to myself. Coming 2 months in the relationship in a few days. Its amazing, its unbelievable and its at the point of -i-want-to-get-married-with-him kind of mind. You may think I am crazy but we both know we will get married. Our marriage.
Of course I have my flaws too. The most worst flaw was jealousy. I admit I get jealous very easily which is very unhealthy for our relationship. Because each time I moody, he will get moody. He will feel that he fail to secure me that's why I am jealous. But many times I told him, its not that I don't trust him but it is just me. My character and my -think-too-much mind. I couldn't help it. I am really trying my best to overcome it. But each time he is not within my sight or I knew he went out with his friends, regardless guy or girl I feel jealous. Maybe jealous because I am not there with him to share his time. But obviously I know that we both need some private time with own friends. He has quite a handful of friends but for me, I can say I practically have no close friends right now.
We love both alot. More than we can imagine. That is why it hurts him when I am jealous. He will reprimand himself what has he done wrong or what has he done not enough to make me not feel jealous. I guess jealousy is unhealthy in a relationship. He always say the story of water. You hold the water the correct tightness it will be there. If you squeeze it too tight, the water will go away from you. The master of this letting go is what he wants me to learn. Its like attaining inner peace. I wish I could change over night. But apparently its not happening now. We are lucky that we are peacefully in love and not have any big argument or quarrels. Who would want them? HAHA! And who doesn't feel jealous! =P
Oh well, just let me whine here because I cannot whine in front of him. I am just angry at myself for behaving like this that is why I am moody. =X
Inner peace!
No comments:
Post a Comment